IS X DANGEROUS?

Cataloging the world’s Dangers

Puppies are small baby dogs. They are usually very cute. Puppies are the dog equivalent of kittens.

Puppies present some low-key threats by nature of being small and active. For example, you may trip over them when they pass underfoot.

To understand the amount of danger a puppy represents, you must consider your relationship to the puppy. If you are only encountering it casually, you may have little or no reason to be afraid. If, on the other hand, you are responsible for its well-being, you should consider the puppy as a slightly greater threat.

Once you adopt or otherwise take charge of a puppy, you will need to consider that it has needs which necessarily supercede your own: you must take it on walks, make sure it eats good food that encourages it to grow, and clean up its poops. If it lives in your house, you may need to be aware that the puppy might destroy or degrade some or all of your furniture, due to its propensity for mischief.

Lastly, puppies have a tendency to reduce their observers to drooling idiots. Their cuteness represents some threat to reasoned, articulate discourse.

In our final analysis, puppies are very slightly dangerous, especially if you are at risk of becoming responsible for one.

Danger Level

0.6

Factors

Commitment, Poops, Cuteness, Mischievous tendencies (forgivable)